Top Ten Tips for Winter Driving in Alaska

Alaska winter driving can be a very spiritually rewarding experience. You’ll at least increase your prayer life quite dramatically and realize your utter dependence on God Almighty. The Lord and I have become close after attempting to drive around Anchorage in winter for 16 years. 

I’ve learned He is also very forgiving when I yell things I shouldn’t at the other drivers. (Here I must say if you can avoid driving whatsoever during the first snowstorm of the season, do it. Just stay home. Everyone, and I mean everyone, forgets how to drive on snow.  They all drive like idiots. But I digress.) If you find yourself needing to drive in the snow, let me share my top ten tips to successfully navigate the roads.

10) Never leave the house without the proper supplies. You know, like shoes. (One time our family arrived at church, and I discovered my 12-year-old wasn’t wearing shoes. I thought my kids were past the age of needing to be reminded to put on shoes, but evidently not.) Other things that will come in handy are a coat, hat, and gloves. Your kids will insist they DO NOT NEED to wear a coat. They are just going from the car into the building. They do not want to carry a coat around all day. None of the other kids wear coats. Blah, blah, blah. I finally gave up and just put all the coats in the car where the kids couldn’t see them. Then, if we got stuck in a snowdrift and had to wait to be rescued, at least they would all have their own coats and wouldn’t be begging to wear mine. On that same note, put a blanket over the coats to hide them, and it can also be used for warmth in an emergency. Also, don’t forget to have kitty litter or sand, to throw on the snow to help with traction if you get stuck, an ice scraper to get all the white stuff off the windshield, a shovel to dig yourself out, etc.

9) Do not drive in your pajamas, even if you are only dropping off your kids at school and coming right back home. Trust me on this one. For those of you who think going to Walmart in your night clothes is completely fine, I suppose you could skip this one. But at least wear your coat over them. Please.

8) Remember to stop and start slowly, this isn’t the Indy 500. If you struggle with remembering, pretend your grandma is riding shotgun and holding a crockpot full of homemade soup in her lap (and the green Jello salad with marshmallows is in the back seat because you couldn’t stand the sight of it). You will be in big trouble if she spills hot soup all over herself (and you end up with green Jello salad in your hair) because you slammed on the brakes.

7) Always leave plenty of room between you and the car in front of you because the idiot behind you, driving way too fast for the conditions, will slam on his brakes but keep sliding toward you. With extra space in front, you have room to pull forward, so you don’t get rear-ended.

6) Be sure to have your winter tires on the car. I don’t care how long the wait at Costco was to get your summer tires taken off and the winter tires put on. Just do it. And do it in September, not December. Tell Siri to remind you early this year so you aren’t trying to get an appointment on the same day as the rest of the procrastinating masses. Or better yet, change them over yourself. (I am fortunate. My sweet hubby changes mine for me.)

5) This one is important. Have snacks and water with you in case you get stuck in a snowdrift, or just stuck behind the school bus that stops at Every. Single. Street. Snacks will keep you alive in the first scenario and less grumpy in the second.

4) Never, ever, ever buy a white car. The authorities won’t be able to find you in a snowdrift.

3) Keep an eye out for wildlife, namely moose, who like to run out in the road right in front of you. Trust me, if you slam on the brakes, you’re going to skid into either the moose or a snowdrift. You don’t want that to happen, especially if you ignored numbered 4 and are driving a white car.

2) Always, always, always stay in the ruts. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT get out of the ruts. Pay no attention to the painted lines which you likely won’t be able to see anyway. Stay in the ruts because if you don’t, your tires will lose their minds in the deeper snow and steer you right into the snowdrift. And if you’re in a white car with no snacks and no blanket or coat and you’re wearing pajamas, you’ll be sorry.

And finally, the number one tip for winter driving . . . 

1) Don’t. Stay home. Sit by the fire, in your pajamas, under a blanket, drinking hot chocolate and eating snacks. And you can praise your Creator for His amazing world and the beauty of the snow swirling outside your window.

Remember to stop and start slowly, this isn’t the Indy 500. If you struggle with remembering, pretend your grandma is riding shotgun and holding a crockpot full of homemade soup in her lap (and the green Jello salad with marshmallows is in the back seat because you couldn’t stand the sight of it).

– Judy Anne Parker

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